So, 36 weeks today, 28 days until my due date, and I am impatiently being patient. This week is full of doctor's appointments including my first that was this morning to get me set up to switch from my current injections of Lovenox over to Heparin which has a shorter half life in my system which is much better for delivery. I was supposed to have my 36 week checkup, but that was changed about a week ago, so I go back to the hospital on Wednesday for my 36 week Group B Strep test and possible internal check. And lastly I have my 36 week ultrasound on Friday to check on Cole's growth as well as fluid level.
It's been really hard not monitoring all the fluids that are leaving my body down in the nether regions as there was so little fluid left when they broke my water with Elizabeth due to a leak. I notice some every once in a while, it dries up, and then a little more. I also don't want to go into an induction unless it's medically necessary, so I'm just going to let the ultrasound on Friday give me the information needed right now and anything after that we will figure out as it comes!
At this point in time I am impatiently trying my hardest to be patient for Cole's arrival. I feel like I am forgetting so many things as my brain is so very scattered, so in that sense, I just don't feel ready for him, yet at the same time I am ready for this pregnancy to be over, to sleep without constant hip pain, and to have clarity and knowledge about both his foot and any other issues that may arise when he is born.
I think this is when FB can get dangerous! There are others who are due 1-2 weeks before me who have posted that they could go any day, or even others due 3-4 weeks who have already delivered. It kinda makes this whole waiting 'game' that much harder. I know that he will come when he and my body are both ready, but I am anxious to see if anything is progressing. I do feel him moving down low much more often than I was, so that is a good sign.
The hardest part of all of this has to be sitting through work. Due to the fact that I had a job change about a month ago, I have not been given much work to do, so I show up at work every day with a few items on the agenda, and then I just sit around and wait for my phone to ring. SO PAINFUL! It's not that much better than sitting at home, organizing a closet, and then flipping through the channels to find something to watch. At least at work I am getting paid and I'm much closer to the hospital, but at the same time it sure makes time go by so much slower.
I will update with any exciting news here as I don't feel like everyone on FB wants to know how much I'm dilated or effaced after every doctor's appointment (or how much weight I've gained for that matter ... which another friend of mine has so wonderfully posted after every appointment and it makes me feel like a cow compared to her '8 total lbs' - sorry, venting). I just have to remember that this all ends, at some point in time, it will all be over, I just have to wait for that time whenever it may be!
Monday, February 27, 2012
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Children's Hospital Consultation Visit
I am SOOO glad this day finally came. After many months of worrying, fretting, crying, and coming to terms with the diagnosis of Cole's clubfoot, I met with the Pediatric Orthopedic Doctor at Children's Hospital who will be taking great care of our little guy and his foot!
First off, the Children's Hospital in Bellevue is absolutely stunning, and even has a Starbucks inside the waiting room (pretty sure I'll be hitting that up a few times!). From the moment we stepped in the office, the staff was amazing, smiling and helping to get everything set up. After being called into the back to meet Dr. Steinman I had peace about the whole situation as there were really only a few questions I had that were not answered by the numerous websites and research I had already conducted.
Since Mark does not have the time to take off work, my dad came with me as both a support as well as to make sure all his questions were answered about his soon-to-be-born grandson. Dr. Steinman first explained that in about 20% of the cases the clubfoot is actually what they call 'positional' and is correctable without any of the casting/boot-wearing/surgery. It will present itself just like clubfoot when he is born, but when we bring Cole in for the first time, she will make the exact diagnosis. The positional form of clubfoot has to do with where his foot has been located during most of the pregnancy in utero and can be treated with some mild stretching, whereas with clubfoot, the muscles and tendons are stronger on one side of the foot than the other.
I will make my appointment for Cole within 1-2 weeks after he arrives and if the determination is made at the first appointment that his case needs to be treated with the Ponseti method, they will put him in his first cast right there. From there it would be a cast change every week for 4-8 weeks (depending on severity), then they would determine if his Achilles tendon would need to be snipped (this is the case in about 50% of clubfoot cases), and then a final cast for 3 weeks. During this time he will have to be sponge bathed exclusively, and due to the fact that his cast will come up near his hip, we will have to watch diaper changes much more closely.
After the final casting he will be moved to the boot. The boot is actually on both feet and they are connected with a bar that will be adjusted to his growing body once a month (they keep it at the width of his shoulders). This is going to be a tough transition, and the doctor prepared me now that it will be a very rough first week with the boot. He will cry, a lot, but I can't give in as he needs to wear the boot 23-1/2 hours a day (other than for checking for sores and bathing) for the first 3 months. She did say that this could possibly delay him rolling over, but in the long run it should not affect any other physical development or milestone.
After the first 3 months in the boot full time, we will move to wearing the boot during nap times and bedtime until he is 4 years old. And again, around that time they will make a determination if another surgery would be needed that would move one of the tendons on top of his foot if the foot continue to turn in and regresses. This surgery would be conducted between the ages of 4 and 6.
The only other thing we will have to likely deal with is that in most cases, one, if not all of the following will be true:
* his feet will be different sizes, with the clubfoot being smaller
* the calf muscle on his right leg will be less developed and will be smaller than the left
* his right leg may be slightly shorter than his left
None of which should affect him severely, but may be something that he could potentially be self conscious of when he gets to junior high or high school. But, thank goodness for Nordstrom if it is the case that his one foot is smaller as they will fit his feet appropriately and not charge us for 2 pairs of shoes!
Dr. Steinman also mentioned that 2 famous 'clubfooters' are Michelle Kwan and Mia Hamm, so I know Mark would be happy to hear that his son could become the next Felix Hernandez down the road!
On a side note, I had my 34 week checkup on Monday and started discussing some of my concerns with my doctor about how quickly my delivery with Elizabeth went, especially after they broke my water (about 2-1/2 hours) as she mentioned it typically goes about twice as fast the second time around. She looked back at my progression of effacement and dilation with Ellie and said that what we may want to do is when I get to a point of showing that my body is truly prepared for delivery, to schedule a time to come in to the hospital to have my water broken here. As much as I would love to have my body do what it needs to do on it's own, the more I think about all of the variables from my blood thinners to Mark potentially not making it to the hospital if it happens during the work day, or having to deliver on the side of the road if my water breaks at home and there is traffic, having the option to schedule my water breaking might just be the best option.
All in all, I was very happy with both my appointments this week, and now, even more so than a week ago, I'm in countdown mode. All the important things are falling into place, a few more things to put up in his room, but his crib is set up, clothes are washed and folded, NB diapers are in the drawer, and big sister's overnight bag is at Nana and Papa's already. The car seat bases are going in soon and my bag will be packed in the next week or 2. Crazy to think it's almost here!
First off, the Children's Hospital in Bellevue is absolutely stunning, and even has a Starbucks inside the waiting room (pretty sure I'll be hitting that up a few times!). From the moment we stepped in the office, the staff was amazing, smiling and helping to get everything set up. After being called into the back to meet Dr. Steinman I had peace about the whole situation as there were really only a few questions I had that were not answered by the numerous websites and research I had already conducted.
Since Mark does not have the time to take off work, my dad came with me as both a support as well as to make sure all his questions were answered about his soon-to-be-born grandson. Dr. Steinman first explained that in about 20% of the cases the clubfoot is actually what they call 'positional' and is correctable without any of the casting/boot-wearing/surgery. It will present itself just like clubfoot when he is born, but when we bring Cole in for the first time, she will make the exact diagnosis. The positional form of clubfoot has to do with where his foot has been located during most of the pregnancy in utero and can be treated with some mild stretching, whereas with clubfoot, the muscles and tendons are stronger on one side of the foot than the other.
I will make my appointment for Cole within 1-2 weeks after he arrives and if the determination is made at the first appointment that his case needs to be treated with the Ponseti method, they will put him in his first cast right there. From there it would be a cast change every week for 4-8 weeks (depending on severity), then they would determine if his Achilles tendon would need to be snipped (this is the case in about 50% of clubfoot cases), and then a final cast for 3 weeks. During this time he will have to be sponge bathed exclusively, and due to the fact that his cast will come up near his hip, we will have to watch diaper changes much more closely.
After the final casting he will be moved to the boot. The boot is actually on both feet and they are connected with a bar that will be adjusted to his growing body once a month (they keep it at the width of his shoulders). This is going to be a tough transition, and the doctor prepared me now that it will be a very rough first week with the boot. He will cry, a lot, but I can't give in as he needs to wear the boot 23-1/2 hours a day (other than for checking for sores and bathing) for the first 3 months. She did say that this could possibly delay him rolling over, but in the long run it should not affect any other physical development or milestone.
After the first 3 months in the boot full time, we will move to wearing the boot during nap times and bedtime until he is 4 years old. And again, around that time they will make a determination if another surgery would be needed that would move one of the tendons on top of his foot if the foot continue to turn in and regresses. This surgery would be conducted between the ages of 4 and 6.
The only other thing we will have to likely deal with is that in most cases, one, if not all of the following will be true:
* his feet will be different sizes, with the clubfoot being smaller
* the calf muscle on his right leg will be less developed and will be smaller than the left
* his right leg may be slightly shorter than his left
None of which should affect him severely, but may be something that he could potentially be self conscious of when he gets to junior high or high school. But, thank goodness for Nordstrom if it is the case that his one foot is smaller as they will fit his feet appropriately and not charge us for 2 pairs of shoes!
Dr. Steinman also mentioned that 2 famous 'clubfooters' are Michelle Kwan and Mia Hamm, so I know Mark would be happy to hear that his son could become the next Felix Hernandez down the road!
On a side note, I had my 34 week checkup on Monday and started discussing some of my concerns with my doctor about how quickly my delivery with Elizabeth went, especially after they broke my water (about 2-1/2 hours) as she mentioned it typically goes about twice as fast the second time around. She looked back at my progression of effacement and dilation with Ellie and said that what we may want to do is when I get to a point of showing that my body is truly prepared for delivery, to schedule a time to come in to the hospital to have my water broken here. As much as I would love to have my body do what it needs to do on it's own, the more I think about all of the variables from my blood thinners to Mark potentially not making it to the hospital if it happens during the work day, or having to deliver on the side of the road if my water breaks at home and there is traffic, having the option to schedule my water breaking might just be the best option.
All in all, I was very happy with both my appointments this week, and now, even more so than a week ago, I'm in countdown mode. All the important things are falling into place, a few more things to put up in his room, but his crib is set up, clothes are washed and folded, NB diapers are in the drawer, and big sister's overnight bag is at Nana and Papa's already. The car seat bases are going in soon and my bag will be packed in the next week or 2. Crazy to think it's almost here!
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Rough Couple of Days
I have had a rough couple of days and I'm trying my hardest to take it all in stride.
Thursday went like most Thursdays go for me. I got into work in the morning, had my morning cup of tea, did some work, had a mid-morning snack, a meeting or two, and then headed to my strength conditioning class. It was a good one and kicked my butt, in a good way! Got back to my desk and frantically made my lunch as I was starving (lunch consisted of part of a sweet potato, some chicken breast and 1/2 avocado). About 1-1.5 hours later I started to not feel well. And I'm not talking about just not feeling well, I was horribly uncomfortable. I couldn't find a position to alleviate my pain/nausea/overall sense of being uncomfortable.
It was getting close to the end of the day and I wasn't so sure I was going to be able to #1-pick up Ellie on my way home and #2-make it home to crawl into a warm bath. I called Mark and asked if he could pick up Elizabeth and I was planning to run to my mom's house and hop in her bath. I have not felt that uncomfortable since I was in labor with Elizabeth. I had no contractions, but for over 2 hours I didn't know what to do. I tried eating something, but all I had at work was some of my leftover chicken enchilada soup, drank more water, and nothing seemed to be working. Then to cap it off, as I was shutting down my computer, my boss called me into a meeting with one of the big sales guys to go over some new products and it was all I could do to answer his questions and do what I could to just get home.
I ended up making it home and was feeling slightly better by that time, but ended up sitting in the tub for a good 20 minutes to just try and relax. Not sure exactly what happened, and I haven't felt like that since then, but I have my 34week checkup on Monday and will tell my OB what happened.
After all the 'excitement' of Thursday I was looking forward to Friday as I only had to work a 1/2 day with a lunch for all of Accounting/Finance and then they sent us home. My plan was to run out to the mall as I have been in need of some new shoes and the Rack was calling my name! Figured since I was in the vicinity that I would run into Babies R Us as well and pick up a few things that I needed as well.
I arrived at Babies R Us and picked up a few things I needed (and a few I really didn't, but picked up as well). I was doing just fine walking through the aisles of the store, grabbing some pacifiers, some diapers that were on sale, and looking at a new hamper for Elizabeth. Once I started heading towards the boys clothes I started to get a feeling of anticipation, or more specifically anxiety. I can't really explain it, but I felt like I was completely glazed over as I was searching the clearance racks of boy clothes. I moved over to the girl clothes and looked for a bit before heading back to the boys side. The feeling came back and I looked for a little while, grabbed a few outfits with a very hardened attitude and left. As I finished putting my loot in the car and headed towards the Rack, I lost it.
After talking with both my mom and sister, I guess there are a few reasons that this happened. In general, I have had a VERY hard time buying clothes for Cole. I have purchased a handful of diapers in all different sizes, items to decorate his room, even painted his room and not felt the same anxiety that has come with walking through the baby boy section of clothes. Having a close friend lose her little guy so shockingly is probably #1 on the list of reasons why, along with the fact that there are still so many unknowns with our monkey.
After our 20 week ultrasound Mark and I both grieved, and we grieved for a good while before we realized that crying and fretting was not going to do anything at this point in time. It was most important that we give the situation to God and try to enjoy every day with Ellie and each other. It took me a little while, but eventually I became at peace with the whole situation and looked forward to finding out how things were progressing at my monthly ultrasounds. I think that subconsciously I have not completely put it all aside, and now, as I am only a little over 6 weeks away from my due date, the anxiety is manifesting when I start to have to plan for the lil guy.
My mom also mentioned the fact that not only has this pregnancy been totally different than with Ellie (which is to be expected as all pregnancies are not alike), and I've had to deal with a lot of things that are just not normal, but with a second pregnancy comes less attention from others. I guess to put it better, people don't make it out to be as big of a deal as it was the first time around. They assume you know what's going on, you have everything you need, and they just don't give the attention to how special the event is, even if it is number 2. With the roller coaster I have been on, I feel much more like I am isolated. I don't talk about the situation with everyone at work, so many don't know what has been going on. All in all, I have had a rough couple of days and I just need to keep focused on the finish line ... hopefully only 6 more weeks, but I'm trying to be realistic and give myself as much as 8 more weeks of all of this until we get to meet Mr. Cole Lewis Hamilton (yes, that is his name. Mark was the one not wanting to tell people, but he has already spilled the beans, so I am only following suit) and have many questions answered.
Lord give me peace in the upcoming weeks to trust that there is nothing more I can do at this point in time. The rest has already been determined.
Thursday went like most Thursdays go for me. I got into work in the morning, had my morning cup of tea, did some work, had a mid-morning snack, a meeting or two, and then headed to my strength conditioning class. It was a good one and kicked my butt, in a good way! Got back to my desk and frantically made my lunch as I was starving (lunch consisted of part of a sweet potato, some chicken breast and 1/2 avocado). About 1-1.5 hours later I started to not feel well. And I'm not talking about just not feeling well, I was horribly uncomfortable. I couldn't find a position to alleviate my pain/nausea/overall sense of being uncomfortable.
It was getting close to the end of the day and I wasn't so sure I was going to be able to #1-pick up Ellie on my way home and #2-make it home to crawl into a warm bath. I called Mark and asked if he could pick up Elizabeth and I was planning to run to my mom's house and hop in her bath. I have not felt that uncomfortable since I was in labor with Elizabeth. I had no contractions, but for over 2 hours I didn't know what to do. I tried eating something, but all I had at work was some of my leftover chicken enchilada soup, drank more water, and nothing seemed to be working. Then to cap it off, as I was shutting down my computer, my boss called me into a meeting with one of the big sales guys to go over some new products and it was all I could do to answer his questions and do what I could to just get home.
I ended up making it home and was feeling slightly better by that time, but ended up sitting in the tub for a good 20 minutes to just try and relax. Not sure exactly what happened, and I haven't felt like that since then, but I have my 34week checkup on Monday and will tell my OB what happened.
After all the 'excitement' of Thursday I was looking forward to Friday as I only had to work a 1/2 day with a lunch for all of Accounting/Finance and then they sent us home. My plan was to run out to the mall as I have been in need of some new shoes and the Rack was calling my name! Figured since I was in the vicinity that I would run into Babies R Us as well and pick up a few things that I needed as well.
I arrived at Babies R Us and picked up a few things I needed (and a few I really didn't, but picked up as well). I was doing just fine walking through the aisles of the store, grabbing some pacifiers, some diapers that were on sale, and looking at a new hamper for Elizabeth. Once I started heading towards the boys clothes I started to get a feeling of anticipation, or more specifically anxiety. I can't really explain it, but I felt like I was completely glazed over as I was searching the clearance racks of boy clothes. I moved over to the girl clothes and looked for a bit before heading back to the boys side. The feeling came back and I looked for a little while, grabbed a few outfits with a very hardened attitude and left. As I finished putting my loot in the car and headed towards the Rack, I lost it.
After talking with both my mom and sister, I guess there are a few reasons that this happened. In general, I have had a VERY hard time buying clothes for Cole. I have purchased a handful of diapers in all different sizes, items to decorate his room, even painted his room and not felt the same anxiety that has come with walking through the baby boy section of clothes. Having a close friend lose her little guy so shockingly is probably #1 on the list of reasons why, along with the fact that there are still so many unknowns with our monkey.
After our 20 week ultrasound Mark and I both grieved, and we grieved for a good while before we realized that crying and fretting was not going to do anything at this point in time. It was most important that we give the situation to God and try to enjoy every day with Ellie and each other. It took me a little while, but eventually I became at peace with the whole situation and looked forward to finding out how things were progressing at my monthly ultrasounds. I think that subconsciously I have not completely put it all aside, and now, as I am only a little over 6 weeks away from my due date, the anxiety is manifesting when I start to have to plan for the lil guy.
My mom also mentioned the fact that not only has this pregnancy been totally different than with Ellie (which is to be expected as all pregnancies are not alike), and I've had to deal with a lot of things that are just not normal, but with a second pregnancy comes less attention from others. I guess to put it better, people don't make it out to be as big of a deal as it was the first time around. They assume you know what's going on, you have everything you need, and they just don't give the attention to how special the event is, even if it is number 2. With the roller coaster I have been on, I feel much more like I am isolated. I don't talk about the situation with everyone at work, so many don't know what has been going on. All in all, I have had a rough couple of days and I just need to keep focused on the finish line ... hopefully only 6 more weeks, but I'm trying to be realistic and give myself as much as 8 more weeks of all of this until we get to meet Mr. Cole Lewis Hamilton (yes, that is his name. Mark was the one not wanting to tell people, but he has already spilled the beans, so I am only following suit) and have many questions answered.
Lord give me peace in the upcoming weeks to trust that there is nothing more I can do at this point in time. The rest has already been determined.
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Quick update
So, I have been thinking of all sorts of different posts that I could put up on here. Complaining about how sleep is getting harder, how much I feel like I have become less productive and more of a big bump on a log the last few weeks, how much weight I put on in 3 weeks, or the fact that I'm only 1lb off of where I was at this same time in my pregnancy with Ellie (wanted to cry when my dr. told me that), or maybe even talking about all the work we have done on both Elizabeth's room as well as the baby's room. But really, it's mostly complaining, isn't it? And I guess that's not what I want this to be.
I am actually very proud of all the work Mark and I put in last weekend on the kids' rooms. We pulled off the closet doors in both rooms and put up curtains to allow for Ellie's dresser to be in the closet and for our file cabinet to fit in the baby's room. My parents brought over a new dresser for Ellie and we moved the dresser/changing table to the baby's room, and in that process also reorganized closets and got rid of ever MORE stuff that had just been sitting, that was a good feeling. All the bags of boys clothes are now out of the baby's crib, and size NB to 3months have all been washed and about 1/2 have been folded and put away. The rooms are still in process, but the big stuff is now out of the way and it's up to me to get some design work done and decided on. I probably pushed myself too hard, but it's getting closer to being done, and that's the important thing!
I have another ultrasound tomorrow to check on the growth of our little monkey, and in a few more weeks I will be switching over my shots from Lovenox to Herparin. This is a pain in the butt as my shots go from 2x a day up to 3x a day, and I have to draw the shots myself, but it also means that I will only be a few weeks away from the end.
February 14th is the day I am looking most forward to right now as that is our consultation with Dr. Steinman at Children's Hospital. Unfortunately, with Mark's new job, he won't be able to join me, but I have an amazing dad who is going to come with me that morning ... I didn't want to do it alone. I am anxious to hear what her plans will be depending on the severity of the clubfoot, as right now I am looking through all my baby clothes and realizing that cute little footie pjs just won't work if he has to have a cast or with his boots.
The other part of Mark's new job is that he will have very little (paid) time to take off once this lil guy comes. It's something we knew would happen, and we are very lucky that Boeing pre-loaded 1/2 of his first year vacation when he started, so he has a full week of vacation time, but that's it. My mom has a few days she can take off along with Spring Break at the beginning of April where she can lend a helping hand, but it is a little daunting to think that only a few days after monkey arrives, i'll be on my own with 2 little ones at home. I know that I have some amazing neighbors who have already offered to help if needed, but i'm trying not to become overwhelmed by the thought of only having Mark's help for a night or 2.
All in all, i'm doing well, trying to make time fly by as it seems to be slowing down little by little every day now. Elizabeth will be 2 in just a few weeks, so i'm trying to focus on getting her party planned and ready (and maybe have the baby's room almost done by the time we have 20 people over to our house!), and tackling one or two small projects every night when I get home from work, even if it's just vacuuming the house, or posting a few more items to Craigslist. Less than 8 weeks until my due date, so i'm preparing myself (and work) that I'm looking at 6-10 weeks before he comes ... so close, yet so far away! :o)
I am actually very proud of all the work Mark and I put in last weekend on the kids' rooms. We pulled off the closet doors in both rooms and put up curtains to allow for Ellie's dresser to be in the closet and for our file cabinet to fit in the baby's room. My parents brought over a new dresser for Ellie and we moved the dresser/changing table to the baby's room, and in that process also reorganized closets and got rid of ever MORE stuff that had just been sitting, that was a good feeling. All the bags of boys clothes are now out of the baby's crib, and size NB to 3months have all been washed and about 1/2 have been folded and put away. The rooms are still in process, but the big stuff is now out of the way and it's up to me to get some design work done and decided on. I probably pushed myself too hard, but it's getting closer to being done, and that's the important thing!
I have another ultrasound tomorrow to check on the growth of our little monkey, and in a few more weeks I will be switching over my shots from Lovenox to Herparin. This is a pain in the butt as my shots go from 2x a day up to 3x a day, and I have to draw the shots myself, but it also means that I will only be a few weeks away from the end.
February 14th is the day I am looking most forward to right now as that is our consultation with Dr. Steinman at Children's Hospital. Unfortunately, with Mark's new job, he won't be able to join me, but I have an amazing dad who is going to come with me that morning ... I didn't want to do it alone. I am anxious to hear what her plans will be depending on the severity of the clubfoot, as right now I am looking through all my baby clothes and realizing that cute little footie pjs just won't work if he has to have a cast or with his boots.
The other part of Mark's new job is that he will have very little (paid) time to take off once this lil guy comes. It's something we knew would happen, and we are very lucky that Boeing pre-loaded 1/2 of his first year vacation when he started, so he has a full week of vacation time, but that's it. My mom has a few days she can take off along with Spring Break at the beginning of April where she can lend a helping hand, but it is a little daunting to think that only a few days after monkey arrives, i'll be on my own with 2 little ones at home. I know that I have some amazing neighbors who have already offered to help if needed, but i'm trying not to become overwhelmed by the thought of only having Mark's help for a night or 2.
All in all, i'm doing well, trying to make time fly by as it seems to be slowing down little by little every day now. Elizabeth will be 2 in just a few weeks, so i'm trying to focus on getting her party planned and ready (and maybe have the baby's room almost done by the time we have 20 people over to our house!), and tackling one or two small projects every night when I get home from work, even if it's just vacuuming the house, or posting a few more items to Craigslist. Less than 8 weeks until my due date, so i'm preparing myself (and work) that I'm looking at 6-10 weeks before he comes ... so close, yet so far away! :o)
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